As I was sitting on the couch at the end of another long day of mom-ing, surrounded by mountains of laundry and interrupted 4 times by baby Gibson waking up crying, my husband straight-faced looked over at me and asked me why I was so stressed. I honestly could not even come up with an answer that wouldn't be completely sarcastic and probably not-so-nice. I know he meant well, bless it, but throughout the next few days I couldn't help but laugh at all the ridiculous things that might possibly cause me to be stressed.
So today I am bringing you "20 reasons why mommy is stressed". You could alternately call it "20 reasons why mommy eats carbs". Or "20 reasons why mommy drinks wine". You choose which title you like best!
1. I finally found the one outfit in my closet that is somewhat flattering and the baby spit up all over it.
2. Everyone needs to poop at the same time.
3. I sat down to eat breakfast and the baby woke up.
4. I just stepped in pee and I don't know how long it's been there or who it belongs to.
5. I gave the 5 year old the "wrong color bowl". Tragedy.
6. I sat down to eat lunch and the baby woke up.
7. I have to say the same thing at least 10 times, at an increasingly higher volume, and it's still a toss-up on whether or not anyone actually listens.
8. I go to change the baby and come back to find that the toddler has thrown all of the freshly folded laundry around the living room.
9. My husband is in the kitchen and I'm across the house, but my kids come find me to ask for a snack. Dude, your dad is literally standing next to the pantry and is fully capable and willing to fix you a snack.
10. I walk out of the room to put the baby down for a nap. I walk back to the kitchen to find the kids "drinking" sprinkles.
11. Everyone is quiet so I make a phone call. Everyone loses their minds as soon as the other person says "hello".
12. The toddler melts down and the baby has a blowout...in Target.
13. The potty training toddler needs to use a public bathroom...I must keep the toddler and baby from touching toilet/floor/handle/all.the.things.
14. I sat down to eat dinner and the baby woke up.
15. The little people who produce the largest amounts of dirty laundry are the same little people who are incapable of washing and putting away their own laundry.
16. The baby woke up at 3:00 AM, 4:00 AM, and 5:00 AM.
17. The three year old decided he would try to wipe his booty all by himself.
18. Me: "Stop arguing with me." Child "I'm not arguing." Me: "Buddy that right there is arguing." Child: "No it's not."
19. Everyone melts down at once...including me.
20. I open the fridge at the end of the day and find that there is NO WINE.
I'm pretty sure these scenarios could take place all in one day. As I am finishing up writing this, Porter is in his room having an epic meltdown over I don't know what #3yearoldprobs, and Evan (who is 5) is asking me to fix him a snack. Because apparently getting a box of Cheerios by himself is asking too much.
Mom life ain't an easy ride, y'all, but it sure is entertaining. And honestly as stressful as it can be, I am still doing it (and adding more kids to our crew along the way) so it can't be all that bad, right?
Can you relate to any of these? What would you add to the list? Let me know in the comments!